Chimie Phisique

As it has been sung, over and over, romance comes down to chemistry. It doesn't matter how good someone is on paper, and how strong that initial physical attraction was, if the chemistry wasn't there on day 1, it ain't coming!! So after 6-7 weeks of seeing Mr Vanilla, I've realised that spark in the bedroom just isn't getting any stronger, and my attentions are wondering. So much so that before I get round to seeing him Friday, to break the news... I already have another date lined up Thursday evening! Now, with this guy there is SUPER chemistry. I saw him a couple of weeks ago in a bar and couldn't stop looking at him, with these glowing spirited eyes, and a smile that took over all his face. Then this Thursday, fate would have him out for drinks with a group of friends, one of whom I know very well. He introduced us, and literally in the space of 5 seconds we were engaged in forget-everyone-else-in-the-room conversation for half an hour... Until I remembered that I was actually there with Mr Vanilla, waiting for me at the bar like the lovely, sweet little puppy he is. Sweet and boring. The next day a little facebook stalking, with the help of our mutual friend, and we were FB friends too, and planning our drinks for this week. I am looking forward to some hot passionate kissing, and then some! Oh yes.

Citizen Kane.

What Shade Are You?

Society likes to keep everything simple... It makes us feel safe. But the human psychee is so complex, is it really possible to break down sexuality into black and white? We grow up surrounded by images of what's "normal" and when we start to feel something other than that, we either try to deny and surpress those feelings, or we push to the other extreme of the pole and find confort in an identity there. But aren't there a million other shades of grey in the sprectrum between black & white, or gay and straight?
Although it is widely accepted in a woman, bisexuality in a man is much more of a taboo subject, and is often dismissed by both gay and straight people alike. I have to say, I feel absolutely comfortable in my sexuality as a gay man, and could not see myself in a relationship with a woman... But recently I found myself in a threesome with a man (also gay) and a woman. It was totally unplanned, and definitely aided by the copious amounts of champagne & tequila consumed; but in the moment I let go to what was happening, and absolutely enjoyed myself.
By the time morning came, and I had sobered up, I did feel a moment of embarassment and regret about what happened, feeling again the pressures of society to fall into a certain stereotype. But instead of hold onto that, we laughed about it, and here I am writing about it. I wonder how much freer we would all feel about sexuality if we weren't imposed certain standards as normaily? What shade would you fall into?

Citizen Kane.

Is a picture worth a thousand words?

Like many of my generation, for a while I surcame to the quick fix of online dating. I tried a few different sites, some were more "date" orientated, others definitely more sexual. All left me equally deluded. How many hours I lost browsing pictures, initiating forced conversations, and going on awkward dates where invariably I would make an excuse to get away ASAP. The old adage says a picture is worth a thousand words, but pictures also tell a thousand lies. No matter how attractive or confident someone would appear in photo, I rarely found this the case in real life. I think the most important thing when you meet someone is the unknowing, unplanned chemistry... You either click or you don't. And you feel it straight away. It's a glance, it's a scent. No photo's or words can ever take the place of that raw animal instinct we call attraction. I have since removed all profiles, and have gone back to meeting potential dates the old fashioned way... Face to face.

Citizen Kane.

Introduction.

I'm a 28 year old, single gay man, living in the big bad city of London. After two years here, the quest for love continues, but a lot of fun to be had along the way. I sing, write and make music. I also manage an Italian menswear brand, although in actual fact I don't really know much about fashion, but I do know about looking good. This blog will be a small glimpse into my life, and my likes. Enjoy, or be shocked, the choice is yours.

Citizen Kane.